Pope's Place

Not to get all Pittsburgh directions on you, but Pope's Place is where Sarney's used to be in Polish Hill. Sometimes that really is the easiest way to explain where something is. Also, the changeover happened in the last year, so it's not like we're telling you to go down by where the Hills used to be.

Anyways, Pope's is still the same kind of neighborhood bar that Sarney's was, but it's brighter and cleaner now. They've done some remodeling and the beer selection is pretty good. The staff and the clientele seem pretty much unchanged, kind of like someone came in and worked around them.

We were happy to be joined by some of our friends at Pope's, one of whom lives a couple blocks away and gave us the low-down on the bar renovations. It is always nice to get a local perspective and he knew all kinds of details about the changes they made with the walls and decor. We also had a really geeky conversation. Like, really geeky. If you know what chaotic neutral half-elf mage is, you would have enjoyed that conversation. 

The bottom line is that if Gooski's is too crowded/smelly/smoky/dirty/whatever for you, Pope's is right there and it's a nice little place.

Address:	3055 Brereton St, 15219	Games:	Poker
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Neighborhood Dive
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	10am-2am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	12
Bathrooms:	Sit-with lotion and tampons!	Specials:	Happy Hour 5-7
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$7.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	4	Size:	Normal

The Rock Room

This bar really lives up to its name as long as your definition of rock does not include names like Creed, Hootie and the Blowfish, or Phil Collins (never inadvertently let Phil Collins into your city…inside joke). If your brand of rock is more Motley Crew, Ramones or Guns and Roses, this could be your place.

 Let's get the really obvious stuff out of the way first. The Rock Room is a giant dive. Dirty, grimy, smoky and nasty are just some of the adjectives that come to mind when trying to describe this bar. The bar, the stools, the walls, and the floor all have been abused and used to the edges of their lives. Thankfully, they keep it dim so you can't see how dirty it really is. The back room has so much fluorescent red light you might think you are in a very different type of seedy establishment. 

So, onto the good. It is super cheap and, ummmmm, the bartender was nice and attentive. That is about it.

We did however end up spending a good deal of time there as we had, all the way from the West coast, Master Dickie Brown along with us for our weekly crawl. We ended up having a good time, but this is our kind of place.

Address:	1054 Herron Ave, 15219	Games:	Pool, Darts, Pinball
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Hipster Punk Dive
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Nasty
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	6
Bathrooms:	Hover	Specials:	daily and nightly
Live music:	Sometimes	Riley Factor:	$7.50
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	3	Size:	Normal

Gooski's

If you have never been to Gooski's, please don't go.  It is for your own good.  Let us give you reasons why you should never go to Gooski's:

1)  It is in Polish Hill.  Polish Hill is, as its name suggests, a huge hill! It is scary and steep and you will probably die if you try to drive up it. So don't.

2)  Parking. It is terrible AND it's on hill. After you park you might have to walk up a hill. That sucks! There is a nice bar with a flat parking lot you can go to somewhere. Go there.

3)  It is really smoky. Like, you will be grossed out and reek of smoke the next day and probably get lung cancer and die. No need to put yourself through that.

4)  It is disgusting. Seriously. It is very dirty in there. Walk in and shine a flashlight on the ATM. We dare you. Actually, we don't. Don't go there. If you do, you will catch Hep C and die.

5)  The people. They will scare you. They are either old-time Polish Hill drinkers or young punks.  They may be grimy and dirty, just like the bar, and they might want to hurt you because you are not grimy and dirty. You should be scared to even walk in because you will probably get beat up by the people there and maybe die. And if you don't get killed by the smoke or the Hep C or the people, then watch out for the bartender for sure because...

6)  There are rules! You have to know what the rules are for ordering a drink. We are not going to tell you what they are. 

7)  The bathrooms. If you think the bar is grimy and dirty, just try to pee.  If you you did manage to scale the mountain, get through the haze of smoke, not get beat up, figure out how to order a drink and then hang out there for awhile eventually you would have to go to the bathroom.  Do you know what has happened in those bathrooms? We do! Think about as bad as you can and then some Courtney Love breakdown kinds of mess. Yeah. 

8)  The bands. There are bands there all the time. They want a cover. They are mostly terrible. So, not only will you be in mortal danger the entire time you are at Gooski's, you may have to listen to terrible music. So, why would you do that to yourself? 

9)  Do you like to dance?! There is no dancing at Gooski's. When there is not a loud band, there is a jukebox full of songs that you can't dance to. You will listen to sad angry indie music or old punk rock and you will hate it. You will have so much more fun somewhere else.   

10)  It is the only bar on Polish Hill that is not a possible heroin den. So, if you go all that way, your only other option would be even worse. Wouldn't you be happier at Industry or The Shady Grove or the whole fucking South Side? Have you heard about the South Side? There are, like, a billion bars there. Go there.

So, really, there is no reason why you should ever go to Gooski's. But, if you decide to go through all that just to have a drink, we'll see you there. 

(Sponsored by our friends in Polish Hill)

Address:	3117 Brereton St 15219	Games:	Pool, Ping Pong, Pinball
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Hipster, Dive, Punk
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Nasty
Smoking:	1970's Pittsburgh	Jukebox:	Awesome
Hours:	-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	12
Bathrooms:	Hover like you mean it	Specials:	Late Night
Live music:	Yes	Riley Factor:	$8.50
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	Yes
TVs:	2	Size:	Average