The Real Luck Cafe

The Real Luck Cafe, or Lucky's, is a weird little dive gay bar down on Penn Avenue. It’s near downtown, but still in the strip. The building is old  and marked by an unlit, duct-taped shamrock sign outside. You have to go around to a side door to get in, so it automatically seems sketchy.

Once you're inside, it's less sketchy, but just as divey. The downstairs bar isn't decorated much and has an old diner vibe to it. On a Monday night, we were the only people in the bar. The bartender wasn't what you would call friendly, but got us our drinks and they were cheap enough. There was popcorn on the bar and free wings on a side table, but I don't know if I would actually eat anything there. It's definitely still a dirty dive bar.

The upstairs bar has DJs and "Hot Male Nude Dancers" on most nights. On a dead Monday though, there were no naked men on the bar. It was just us, a bored bartender, and Mike and Molly on the TV.

Address:	1519 Penn Ave, 15222	Games:	Pinball, Poker
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Dive
Parking:	Easy at night	Patio/Outdoor:	Yes
Kitchen:	Pizza and Wings	Cleanliness:	Nasty
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	4pm-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	4
Bathrooms:	Hover	Specials:	Daily Special and Happy Hour
Live music:	DJs upstairs	Riley Factor:	$8.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	Yes
TVs:	3	Size:	Normal

Crystal on Penn

This is a random little bar tucked away on Penn Avenue towards downtown, but still in the Strip. On the Monday we were there, there was a very serious Texas Hold ‘em tournament going on that filled up the entire back room. People were shouting rules and reminders and times and blinds, and one particularly obnoxious guy yelled "BOOM" and stood up whenever he won. It was all very serious.

At the bar, it was not any less weird. The older man at the end of the bar was counseling a friend to "never, ever, ever sell real estate." What if someone offers you 4x what your real estate is worth and then you use your massive windfall profit to buy more real estate? We find his theory to be flawed at the very least. In the same conversation there was also some shouting about a volcano. We’re amateurs, but we think that if there’s a volcano that you should definitely go ahead and sell that real estate.

We are beating up on this little place too much, so let's talk about the good. There are Hot Fries. You remember, the Andy Capp Hot Fries that you never see anymore. How Andy Capp became associated with Hot Fries we don’t know, but we both used to love them and hadn't seen them for ages. So if you are looking for your Hot Fries fix, Crystal's has got you covered. Also, the bartender was cool and was digging into a bag of Hot Fries herself.

The bar itself is average sized with average beer and average booze. It is nothing special. But if you stop in there one day, you might hear crazy loud phrases and terrible advice. There's a Volcano!

Address:	1211 Penn Ave, 15222	Games:	Magic Touch
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Slightly weird
Parking:	Easy at night	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Naormal
Smoking:	None	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	11:30am-2am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	4
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	Happy Hour 5-7
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$6.50
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	5	Size:	Hole in the Wall

Lefty's

Lefty's is one of the only true dive bars left in the strip. It's pretty much what you would expect. It's not filthy, but it's not especially clean. The drinks are cheap, but they're not fancy or varied. The two drink specials consisted of a “strong” island iced tea and red bull and vodka. There's a pool table and darts. Everyone there seemed pretty content to keep to themselves and drink their drinks.

The last time J was there on a weekend afternoon (errands gone astray with editor C), a girl came in, sat down on a stool, ordered a whiskey, and then fell right off of said stool. "I'm not even drunk," she said. Haven't we all said that lie at some drunken point? The bartender was quick and decisive: picked the girl up, put her on a couch, took away her whiskey, and got her water.


So, it might not be a fancy place, but they know what to do with your drunk ass if it falls over. That's always nice. Plus they have Coors Original which no one ever has. It's like the forgotten cheap domestic beer.

Address:	2021 Penn Ave, 15222	Games:	Pool, Darts
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Sports Dive
Parking:	Easy at night	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	None	Cleanliness:	Nasty to Normal
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	11am-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	0
Bathrooms:	Hover	Specials:	"Strong" Islands
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$5.00 but really a strong single
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	Yes
TVs:	>10	Size:	Hole in the Wall

Roland's

Roland's has been in the Strip District in one form or another since the 1940's, with the current building opening in 1959. It is enormous. It is probably more of a restaurant than a bar, but we were hungry and we have been there to just drink in the past. So we decided to stretch one of our rules. Don't judge us!

When you walk in there is a huge bar to the right of the door, which could probably sit 35 people if you forced us to estimate. We can't imagine a scenario where we would be forced to estimate such a thing, but work with us. It is not super bright, but not as dim as we prefer our bars to be. They have the standard bar liquor and an extensive beer selection. The menu is large and varied, and as we mentioned earlier, we were very hungry. J ordered a swordfish salad. A ordered the famous lobster roll, which was good (A is about to sound like a snob in 3, 2…), but not as good as ones he has had at road-side stands in Maine.

The bartender was very friendly and enthusiastic; very enthusiastic. A was forced to drink a Riley because the bartender was so excited about how strong and cheap a double jack and coke was at his place. A didn't even get a chance to explain that he didn't actually want one, he just wanted to know the price, which in the bartender's defense is an odd request. The drink was rather strong, as advertised.

Overall, this is a good place to stop at if you are in the Strip. There is a lot of space, the food and service are good and they have an amazing brunch. They have been open for 50+ years for a reason.

Address:	1904 Penn Ave, 15222 http://www.rolandsseafoodgrill.com/	Games:	Poker, Putting Green, Multi-cade
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Seafood
Parking:	Easy at night	Patio/Outdoor:	Yes
Kitchen:	Come Hungry	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	None	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	11am-12am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	40
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	3-6pm Happy Hour and Daily $5 specials
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$6.00 but really a strong single
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	>10	Size:	Friggin' Huge

Rocco's

Rocco's is the dive bar of Swisshelm Park. It is tucked away on a residential street next to a pizza parlor and it looks exactly like you would expect it to. When you walk in there is a huge horseshoe bar that takes up almost the entire main floor. The floor is black and white checkered tile, the lights are dim, and chances are that if you were there last weekend you will be there this weekend as well. It is 100% a local bar. There is a smaller bar and some more seating up a half flight of stairs, but that space is mainly used for parties and the occasional karaoke night.

Are you ever going to Rocco's? Probably not. We would certainly never recommend anyone to go out of their way, but this is one of our local bars so we feel like we can give it a bit of a shout out. You probably wouldn’t be able to get a seat, even if you found it. It’s a surprisingly popular spot and not very big. We have had a lot of fun at Rocco's. It is really a no pretense kind of place. We have danced and sang and taken over the entire upper floor of the bar. Plus, we can stumble home. Well, at least A and C can and have. There is not much to this place, but as with most things, it is not where you are but who you are with that makes a night fun.

Address:	7105 Harrison Ave, 15218	Games:	Shuffleboard
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Neighborhood Dive
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	None	Cleanliness:	Normal-Nasty
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	4
Bathrooms:	Hover	Specials:	Being cheap
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$6.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	Yes
TVs:	1	Size:	Hole in the Wall

Pope's Place

Not to get all Pittsburgh directions on you, but Pope's Place is where Sarney's used to be in Polish Hill. Sometimes that really is the easiest way to explain where something is. Also, the changeover happened in the last year, so it's not like we're telling you to go down by where the Hills used to be.

Anyways, Pope's is still the same kind of neighborhood bar that Sarney's was, but it's brighter and cleaner now. They've done some remodeling and the beer selection is pretty good. The staff and the clientele seem pretty much unchanged, kind of like someone came in and worked around them.

We were happy to be joined by some of our friends at Pope's, one of whom lives a couple blocks away and gave us the low-down on the bar renovations. It is always nice to get a local perspective and he knew all kinds of details about the changes they made with the walls and decor. We also had a really geeky conversation. Like, really geeky. If you know what chaotic neutral half-elf mage is, you would have enjoyed that conversation. 

The bottom line is that if Gooski's is too crowded/smelly/smoky/dirty/whatever for you, Pope's is right there and it's a nice little place.

Address:	3055 Brereton St, 15219	Games:	Poker
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Neighborhood Dive
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	10am-2am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	12
Bathrooms:	Sit-with lotion and tampons!	Specials:	Happy Hour 5-7
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$7.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	4	Size:	Normal

Zano's Pubhouse

We have never seen a more blue collar bar on a Friday night. This newly re-opened bar in "The Run" (it used to be Chaser’s) is a pretty hopping place on a weekend night. We kind of felt like this is what bars must have been like in the old steel days: hardworking folks and girls with giant hair. For some reason Flashdance comes to mind.

It was too crowded for us to get seats at the bar so we had to sit at a high top in the back, which happens when you go out on a Friday night. The space itself is nice enough: long bar, wide hanging out / high top area. It’s still your typical drop-ceiling and wood panel neighborhood bar, though. There is a pool table in the back where a middle-aged guy wearing an Eagles jersey was spinning some righteous tunes. There is also a seating area in the bar with booths and tables, so we are guessing they have some sort of food available as well.


We had a nice enough time there, but would never recommend that anyone go out of their way to go there. The Run is such a weird little neighborhood. We are glad they have a bar like Zano's to call their own.

Address:	3806 Acorn St, 15207	Games:	Pool, Darts
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Neighborhood Dive
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	10am-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	12
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	Daily
Live music:	Sometimes	Riley Factor:	$6.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	Yes
TVs:	6	Size:	Normal