Crystal on Penn

This is a random little bar tucked away on Penn Avenue towards downtown, but still in the Strip. On the Monday we were there, there was a very serious Texas Hold ‘em tournament going on that filled up the entire back room. People were shouting rules and reminders and times and blinds, and one particularly obnoxious guy yelled "BOOM" and stood up whenever he won. It was all very serious.

At the bar, it was not any less weird. The older man at the end of the bar was counseling a friend to "never, ever, ever sell real estate." What if someone offers you 4x what your real estate is worth and then you use your massive windfall profit to buy more real estate? We find his theory to be flawed at the very least. In the same conversation there was also some shouting about a volcano. We’re amateurs, but we think that if there’s a volcano that you should definitely go ahead and sell that real estate.

We are beating up on this little place too much, so let's talk about the good. There are Hot Fries. You remember, the Andy Capp Hot Fries that you never see anymore. How Andy Capp became associated with Hot Fries we don’t know, but we both used to love them and hadn't seen them for ages. So if you are looking for your Hot Fries fix, Crystal's has got you covered. Also, the bartender was cool and was digging into a bag of Hot Fries herself.

The bar itself is average sized with average beer and average booze. It is nothing special. But if you stop in there one day, you might hear crazy loud phrases and terrible advice. There's a Volcano!

Address:	1211 Penn Ave, 15222	Games:	Magic Touch
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Slightly weird
Parking:	Easy at night	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Naormal
Smoking:	None	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	11:30am-2am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Dirt Cheap	# taps:	4
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	Happy Hour 5-7
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$6.50
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	5	Size:	Hole in the Wall