Casey's Draft House

To save us time, sanity, and to keep us from writing "this is a typical South Side bar" over and over, we're taking a different approach: haiku. Assume everything you know about the South Side to be true, our haiku will fill in the gaps.

loads of tequilas

too bad you're the "midget" bar
so we just hate you

Address:	1811 East Carson St, 15203    http://www.caseysdrafthouse.com/	Games:	Boxing, Darts, Golden Tee
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Tequila and Beer
Parking:	Wear Walking Shoes	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	11am-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	24
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	Daily
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$8.50
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	7	Size:	Normal

July Round Up

Bars visited: 20
Reviews Published: 24
Neighborhoods hit: South Side, Shadyside, North Side, Bloomfield

A:

• Best Bar: I think my best bar expirence in July was at Park House. Still waiting by our phone.
• Worst Bar: Funnilly enough the very next bar, Peanutz, was the very worst bar, maybe ever. We left beers people.  Beers!
• Biggest Surprise: Social. New bar in Bakery Sqaure! Smart people drinking!
• Biggest Disappointment: Armand's. That place is nasty. Eat the famous fish sandwich at your own risk.
• What did A learn: When people warn you that it is probably ok to go somewhere since it is daylight out, be ready for anything.

J:

• Best Bar: Best might be pushing it for Lou's, but I have a lot of good memories there.
• Worst Bar: Margaritaville was by far the worst. Neon green ecto-cooler flavored margaritas are not okay.
• Biggest Surprise: Coppertops was quite a pleasant South Side surprise.
• Biggest Disappointment: That Ms PacMan wasn't working at Mardi Gras.
• What did J learn: Sometimes you need to substitute quantity for quality in these things.

Levelz-CLOSED

Normally this bar would warrant a stupid South Side bar haiku, but it was so bad that it deserves a few lines. As per our recent review of Peanutz, we know that nothing good comes from changing an s to a z. And so it was at Levelz.

Whether you take the recent stabbings, the outright hatred the bartender had for us, or the overwhelming stench of bleach on a Sunday night there is absolutely no reason for anyone to go into this bar, ever. Add in the fact that the bathroom was totally unusable and had a bandage with blood on it stuck to the wall, man, you've got a winner.

Do you really care how many floors there are or whether there's a basketball game?  We're just going to tell you to avoid this place at all costs.

Edit: I guess we don't have to tell you that, the city has shut it down.

Address:	1825 East Carson St, 15203	Games:	Basketball Hoop
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Scary and Bleached
Parking:	Wear Walking Shoes	Patio/Outdoor:	Don't think so...
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Nasty
Smoking:	None	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	20
Bathrooms:	Hold It	Specials:	Nightly
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$9.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	>8	Size:	Friggin' Huge

Piper's Pub

Piper's Pub is the place to go in Pittsburgh if you are interested in either Scotch or soccer. They have the largest selection of Scotch in the ‘burgh and are so into soccer that they call it football. Traitors.

Despite their aversion to American sports naming conventions, Piper's is a solid bar. In addition to their Scotch menu, they have an incredible draft beer list. The bar is cozy and warm with golden wood and stained glass lighting. The crowd is completely determined by whether there's a soccer football game on the TV. When there’s a game, it's a lively and boisterous crowd. When there’s not a  game, it's decidedly more sedate.

The food is a mix of Scottish and American standards, but everything has always been good. A had the bangers and mash and cleaned his plate and J had the Ploughman’s Wrap. If you're looking for a serious hangover cure, you cannot go wrong with a boxty from Piper's. Nothing soaks up last night's mistakes like a giant potato pancake filled with stuff.

In general, it's a more mature crowd and a welcome respite from the majority of East Carson Street. And really, where else can you get Scotch eggs in Pittsburgh?

Address:	1828 East Carson St, 15203    http://piperspub.com/	Games:	None
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Scotch and Soccer
Parking:	Wear Walking Shoes	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	Come Hungry	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	None	Jukebox:	None
Hours:	M-F 11am-12am, Sat-Sun 8:30am-12am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Richie Rich	# taps:	39
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	None
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$11.50
ATM:	No	Cash Only	No
TVs:	3	Size:	Normal

Inn-Termission Lounge-CLOSED

To save us time, sanity, and to keep us from writing "this is a typical South Side bar" over and over, we're taking a different approach: haiku. Assume everything you know about the South Side to be true, our haiku will fill in the gaps.

Heavy-metal show
Bubble-hockey, pinball game
Poor signage, good bar

Address:	1908 East Carson St, 15203	Games:	Pool, Pinball, Bubble Hockey
Façade:	Scary	Scene:	Punk
Parking:	Wear Walking Shoes	Patio/Outdoor:	No
Kitchen:	None	Cleanliness:	Normal
Smoking:	Some	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	-2am	Cig Machine:	Yes
Drink Prices:	Average	# taps:	10
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	Daily
Live music:	Sometimes	Riley Factor:	$8.00
ATM:	Yes	Cash Only	No
TVs:	4	Size:	Normal

Shady Grove

Sometimes it is hard to come up with really insightful things to say about a bar, especially a middle of the road bar like Shady Grove. Is it a great bar? No. Is it a terrible bar? No. So what to say?

Mostly, Shady Grove seems like a great place to meet yuppies. Much like hipsters, yuppies hate admitting they are yuppies, but get over it people. Embrace your yuppie lifestyle! We are not hating here, just observing. At any rate, this seems like one of the primo bars for single yuppies to meet other single yuppies on a weekend night. So if that is you, then get on down there for some making eyes at someone and then going home disappointed.

We both had pizza here. It was ok. Our impressions were “super-bland” and “tasted like Pizza Hut.” So...

This bar does have a purpose, but its purpose is not applicable to us. Chances are low that we will return to the obviously named Shady Grove any time soon.
 

Address:	5500 Walnut St, 15232 http://www.eatshady.com/	Games:	Magic Touch
Façade:	Not Scary	Scene:	Shadyside Yuppie
Parking:	Easy	Patio/Outdoor:	Yes
Kitchen:	Bar Food	Cleanliness:	Nice
Smoking:	None	Jukebox:	Internet Crap
Hours:	11am-2am	Cig Machine:	No
Drink Prices:	Richie Rich	# taps:	7
Bathrooms:	Sit	Specials:	Nightly
Live music:	Never	Riley Factor:	$11.00
ATM:	No	Cash Only	No
TVs:	7	Size:	Normal